I know that I'm not writing as much as I used to. This has always happened with any "journal" that I have kept. When I'm not feeling good, I can't find the energy to write and when I do sit down to write, I seem to have nothing to say. I know: This doesn't seem possible as this is a blog about training Paige and there must still be training going on. True. But the ability to put it into words is what is missing. This is the truly disabling part of mental illness. The good days are good and you function like everybody else. It's the bad times that are so hard and frustrating.
This time around, I'm having a lot of trouble staying organized and being anything that looks like consistent. I have forgotten keys to either my parents or to the apartment at home 2 days in a row. I double checked that I had both pairs with me this morning because I would need them both with me in the next few days. I have forgotten my date book numerous times. And a number of other things. I can't even remember what I've forgotten. And sometimes it's silly. I will end up moving something to the counter that is right beside/above the bag that I'm going to take out the door in a couple of minutes and I'll still manage to forget it. I've been forgetting where I've put stuff down. This is very unusual for me because I have excellent placement memory. If I've seen it, I can tell you exactly where I saw it last. Nick makes excessive use of this ability. "Where are the keys/wallet/novel/phone/...?"
As for Paige, we've had some progress and some set backs. Progress: While working on "Take it" she picked up her nylabone for me the other day and actually took a step with it in her mouth. She missed my hand on the Give but I threw her a party anyway. Getting her unstuck from one spot has been very difficult. I find it very helpful to throw her parties as often as possible when training. It makes it really fun and lets her know when she did something really super.
Another thing we've had progress in is the lean command. I've been trying to figure this one out for a while. The basis for it is shoulder targeting - for the dog to touch stuff with their shoulder instead of there nose, for example. I want her to be shoulder targeting my leg to help me get grounded again when I get anxious. She is going to lean into me with her body weight. I've had a lot of trouble trying to shape her to do this but she does it naturally when she's giving me love. She leans into and rubs on stuff all the time. So I grabbed the clicker and the treat bag and am trying to capture her when she does it. I caught it a few times the other day. After every time I catch it, I approach her and touch her with my leg. She's not moving away any more when I touch her with my leg but she's not closing the distance yet. I'm sure it will come now that we've started on it.
More progress: Paige is getting closer to be able to walk past that Basset hound in the alley. This dog is completely under exercised and neglected. They leave him and 2 others in the backyard all day long. Out of boredom and pent up energy, this dog barks all day and attacks his fence when somebody walks past. He really gets Paige going so I've been working on being able to walk closer. The goal is to be able to walk past the fence without caring. That's the goal. For now, Paige isn't pulling as much when we do get close and she is having more luck paying attention to me. It was funny the other day. I have been trying to get her to "touch" when she hears him. The point is to give her something else to do other than bark. The funny was that she was doing both at once. Touch, bark, touch, bark. It's an improvement. If she's staying close enough to touch, then she's not pulling me down the alley.
The fall back: Paige has forgotten how to walk on a loose leash and is pulling to meet people. Both of these are really bad things. So we've been working on our focusing which helps with loose leash. If she's focusing on me while walking, she can't be ahead of me and she's watching if I turn. To help with this, it's been a few very treat rich walks and slowly I'll start to decrease the treats again. I'm only using low value treats at this point - kibble and small crunchy treats. For her, it seems to be more about stuff landing in her mouth than what that something is. But I do need yummier stuff for any new behaviour. With meeting people, she just has to get it through her skull that she can't. Which means that every time we meet somebody on the street, she has to ignore them. If she can't ignore them than she definitely doesn't get to meet them. If she does keep her focus on me, then she can say hi, if the circumstances are appropriate. I've suspended outings until these issues are cleared up. I can't have a SD pulling me down an aisle in Safeway to meet somebody.
And so, training continues.
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